Online dating rules etiquette

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The 42-year-old actress and comedian invited Mr Hanson on an episode of her Netflix show, Chelsea, to teach her how to curtsey, hold a Champagne flute and greet Her Majesty.

The pair met for the one-on-one lesson at the Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon in Fortnum and Mason, central London.

Chelsea had apparently contracted SARS while on her travels and so kept coughing throughout our tea.

The distant notes from Fortnum's piano somewhat drowned out by the noise of celeb catarrh.

She said it was pretentious - I agree with her on the teacup issue. We did cover food protocol but as much of that didn't make the cut and coupled with my extensive therapy since, I can't remember what happened.

The next point for her curiosity was my 'accent', 'What an interesting accent you have! I 'complimented' her on her own accent and then she garbled back something at me that was perhaps Japanese, perhaps a stroke. After some instruction on royal bowing and curtseying (it was brief as Americans don't really have to bow to the royal family - but many like to) we sat down for tea.I wasn't going to sit there, surrounded by expensive wallpaper, for her to swear - and I said as much. Clearly a favourite area for Chelsea - she had ordered champagne with her afternoon tea. Miss Handler was holding the glass from the bowl of the flute and not correctly from the stem.That won't help her reputation as a borderline alcoholic.The etiquette coach also taught Chelsea the correct way to curtsey: keep the hands by the side, place one foot behind the other, bend the knees, and drop the head.Meanwhile men should simply bend their head in respect.

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